INTRODUCTION
First of all I always want to tell folks that I am not giving
this testimony because I have any ill feeling in my heart toward the
Roman Catholic people. I couldn't be a Christian if I still had bitterness
in my heart. God delivered me from all bitterness and strife one day and
made Himself real to me in the power of the Holy Spirit. And so, when
I give this testimony, I'm giving it because after God saved me,
he delivered me out of the convent and out of bondage to darkness,
the Lord laid a burden upon my heart to give this testimony that
others might know what plight the convents are. And so as you listen
carefully this afternoon, I trust that I'll not say one thing that will
leave any feeling in your heart whatsoever that I don't carry a burden
for the Roman Catholic people. I don't like the things they do. I
don't agree with the things that they teach, but I covet their souls
for Jesus. I'm interested in their souls. I believe that when Jesus
went to Calvary, He died that you and I might know Him. And their souls
are just as precious as your soul and my soul. So I'm interested.
DESIRE TO WORK FOR GOD
First of all, as we get into this testimony, having been born
into Roman Catholicism, not knowing anything else, not knowing the
Word of God, because we didn't have the Bible in our home. We had never
heard anything about this wonderful plan of salvation. And so, naturally,
I grew up in that Roman Catholic home as a child knowing only the catechism,
knowing only the teaching of the Roman Catholic Church. And because I loved
the Lord, and because I wanted to do something for Him - I wanted to give
Him my life - I didn't know of any other way for a Roman Catholic girl
to give her life to God other than by entering a convent.
After going to the confessional box, where naturally I'm under
the influence of my Father confessor, the Roman Catholic Priest
- his influence over my life - one day I made up my mind, through
His influence and one of my teachers in the parochial school that I
wanted to be a little sister. At that time I thought of being a sister
of the Open Order. And as I went on into this, up until the time I
took my White Veil, sixteen and a half years of age, everything was
beautiful. I really didn't have any fear in my heart whatsoever.
Everything that was taught to me seemingly along the lines of what I
had been taught in the Church before I had entered the convent.
And so one day, after making up my mind to enter the Convent,
I remember that particular day, two of the sisters came home with me
from school. They were my teachers. They arrived in my father's home
that afternoon, and our Father confessor was in the home likewise. I often
say that when I was a little girl, children were seen and not heard. You
didn't talk when you were a child, at least you didn't in my family in
my home, unless you were spoken to. And I remember I listened to
them carry on a conversation. And then I moved over close enough to my
father to ask him if I could say something. That was a bit out of the
ordinary. And he permitted me to talk. And I said, "Dad, I want to go
into a Convent." And I'll tell you that priest took it up quickly. They
already had been influencing me.
My father broke down and began to cry, not because he was sad,
but because he was so happy. My mother came over and took me in her
arms and she, too, wept tears - she was very happy. Those were not tears
of sadness because to think that her little girl was giving her life to the
Convent to pray for lost humanity. And naturally, my family was very thrilled
about it. And I was, too.
INTO THE CONVENT
But anyway I didn't go for about a year after that. And then the
time came when I was to leave and my mother prepared things for me.
So I entered the convent. They took me. And they didn't have a place
close enough to my father's and mother's home, so I think they took me
around a thousand miles away from my home. So I entered a convent
boarding school. I lasted about three months being thirteen years
of age - just as a girl. I look back on it now, and think... my.
Homesick? I was so homesick! Why, my mommy and daddy, they stayed
three days with me and then they left. I became so homesick. Naturally,
why shouldn't I? -- I was just a baby never away from home. When I was
a little girl, you know, I never spent a night away from my mother.
And I surely had never gone any place without my family. And naturally
there was close ties in my family, and I was very lonely and very homesick.
But I'll never forget after Dad and mother told me, "Good-bye." And
I knew they'd be traveling a long distance away from me. And I had never
realized in my heart I'll never see them again. Naturally I hadn't
planned it like that because I had planned to be a sister of
the Open Order.
But if you listen carefully to this portion of the testimony then
you'll understand just why I'm saying some of the things
I am saying. Now oftentimes we say the priest selects
his material through the confessional box, because at seven years
of age I went to confessional. At seven years of age I would
always, when I'd come into the church first, first I'd sit there at
the feet of a crucifix. I'd go to the Virgin Mary and then at
the feet of the crucifix, and I'd ask the Virgin Mary to help
me make a good confession... because I was a child and my
heart was honest. And I knew that the the priest taught us to always
make a good confession - keep nothing back - tell everything
if I expected absolution from any sin that I might have committed.
And so I would ask the Virgin Mary to help me make a good
confession. And I would ask Jesus to help me make a good confession.
And, I'll assure you, after I lived in the convent for a short
period of time I had to go on with my schooling -- I had just finished
the eighth grade. And they promised me to give me a High School
education and some college education. But I didn't get much college.
I got mostly just high school training. And they gave that
to me all right. I took it under some terrible difficulties
and strains and all of that - it was rather difficult. But they gave it
to me for which I appreciate very very much. But I'll assure
you, after they they put me through the crucial training that
we must go through to become just a little novitiate entering
a convent, the training is really, it's outstanding as far as the
nun is concerned, and you'll know what its all about after you've been
in there for a little while.
So now I entered the convent. And for just a few minutes we want
to tell you just a little bit how we lived - what we eat, how
we sleep. If I take you into the convent and tell you about those
things, you'll understand a little bit more about my
testimony.
THE WHITE VEIL
First, as I entered the convent, as just a small child I
went on to school, I was being trained. But the day came when
I was about fourteen and a half when the Mother Superior began
telling me about the "White Veil." And I didn't know too much
about it. By taking the White Veil, they told me that I would
become the spouse or the Bride of Jesus Christ. There would be
a ceremony. And I would be dressed in a wedding garment.
And on this particular morning, they told me at nine o'clock
they would dress me up in a wedding garment. Now, you're
wondering where that came from, and how they got the wedding
clothes for the little nuns. The Mother Superior sits down and writes
a letter to my father to tell him how much money she wants. And
then, whatever she asks, my father sends it. And she, the little
buying sister, goes out and buys the material, and the wedding gown is
made by the Nuns of the Cloister. (I'm still Open Order now.)
And of course, whatever she asks -- now you say, "Did they spend
all of the money for the wedding gown?" Well of course, We don't know
these things at the very beginning of our testimony, but after
we live in a convent for a little while, we learn to know they
could ask my father for a hundred dollars and he'd send it.
They would not use maybe a third of that for the wedding garment.
They would keep the rest of it, and my father would never know
the difference. Neither did I until I'd lived in a convent for
a period of time and I had to make some of the wedding
clothes. And then I knew the value of them, and what they
cost. And I knew of the money that came in because I was one
of the older Nuns.
Well, alright, the time came, of course, when I walked down that
aisle and I was dressed in a wedding garment. And you know, in
the convent, I used to walk the fourteen stations of the cross the
fourteen steps that Jesus carried the cross to Calvary, but
after I made up my mind to take the White Veil, never again
did I walk. I wanted to be worthy. I wanted to be holy enough
to become the spouse or the Bride of Jesus Christ. And so I would
get down on my knees and crawl the fourteen stations - quite
a distance. But I crawled them every Friday morning. I thought
it would make me holy. I felt it would draw me closer to God.
It would make me worthy of the step that I was going to take. And
that's what I wanted more than anything in the world.
I would like to impress that in your hearts.
Every little girl that enters a convent that I know anything
about, that child has the desire to live for God. That child
has the desire to give her heart and mind and soul to God.
Now, many, many people make this remark and we hear it from various
types of folks who say, "Only bad women go into convents." That
isn't true. There are movie stars who go into convents. They've lived
out in the world and no doubt they are sinners and all of
that. But they go in when they're women. They know what they're
doing. And they go in only because the Roman Catholic Church
is going to receive, not only thousands, but yea it will run up
into the millions of dollars. And they don't mind who they take
in as they can get a lot of money out of an individual.
But when the woman goes in as just a child - she's just a
child - and she goes in there with her heart and mind and soul
just as clean as any child could be. I say that because
sometimes we hear a lot of things that are really not true.
Now, after we become the spouse of Jesus Christ - I want you
to listen carefully to this, and then you can follow me into
the rest of the testimony - we are now looked upon as married
women. We are looked upon as married women. We are the
spouse or the Bride of Jesus Christ.
BECOMING THE BRIDE OF CHRIST
Now, the priest teaches that every little girl that will take
the White Veil they'll become the bride of Christ. He teaches
her to believe that her family will be saved. It doesn't make
any difference how many banks they rob, how many stores they
rob. It doesn't make any difference how they drink and smoke
and carouse and live out in this sinful way and do all the things
that sinners do. It doesn't make a bit of difference.
Still, our family will be saved if we continue to live in the convent
and give our lives to the convent or to the Church, we can rest
assured that every members of our immediate family will be saved.
And you know that there are many little children that are
influenced and enticed to to go into convents because we
realize that it will be the salvation for our families. And
sometimes, even Roman Catholic family, the children grow up
and leave the Roman Catholic Church and go out into the
deepest of sin. And so every little girl that enters into the convent
is hoping by her sacrificing so much - home and mother and daddy
- everything that a child loves - her family will be saved regardless
of what sins they commit. And of course we're children and
our minds are immature and we don't know any better. And it's
so easy to instill things like that into the hearts and minds of
little children .. and the priest is really very good at it.
And of course we looked upon our priest - our Father confessor
- I looked upon him as God. He's the only God I knew anything
about. To me he is infallible. I didn't think he could sin.
I didn't think that he would lie. I didn't think that he ever
made a mistake. I looked upon him as the holiest of holies, because
I didn't know of God, but I did know the Roman Catholic Priest.
And to me, I looked to him for everything that I asked of any
of God, so to speak, I believed the priest would give it to me.
And so the day comes and we, all of us now - and as we go on in,
I want you to listen carefully, after taking the White Veil
- things are beautiful. I'm sixteen and a half years of age.
Everyone's good to me. And I'm living in the convent and I
haven't seen anything yet, because no little girl - we're not
subject to a Roman Catholic Priest until we're twenty-one years
of age. And as we give you this next vow, then you'll understand
- we don't know about this. This is kept from the little sisters
until we've taken our Black Veil and then it's too late.
I don't carry the keys those double doors, and there's no way for
me to come out. The priests will tell all over the whole United
States and other countries that sisters, or Nuns, rather, can walk
out of convents when they want to. I spent twenty-two years there,
I did everything there was to do to get out. I've carried table
spoons with me into the dungeon and tried to dig down into that dirt
because there's no floors in those places. But I never yet found
myself digging far enough to get out of a convent with a table spoon,
and that's about the only instrument - because when we're using the spade
- and we do have to do hard, heavy work - when we use a spade we're
being guarded - we're being watched by two older Nuns and
they're going to report on it -- and I'll assure you you're
not going to try and dig out with a spade. You wouldn't get very
far anyway, because they built and made those convents, or built those convents,
so little Nuns cannot escape. That was their purpose in
building them, as they build them. And there's no way for us to get
out unless God makes a way. But I believe God's making a way
for numbers of little girls to come out of the convent.
THE BLACK VEIL
Now when the time comes, I think I was eighteen when the
Mother began talking to me. I planned to come out, see, after
my White Veil. I wanted to be a little nursing sister in the Roman
Church. But the Mother Superior - I suppose she was watching
my life - I suppose she realized I had much endurance, I had a strong
body. And I believe the woman was watching me, because one day
she asked me to come into her office. And she began to tell
me, "Charlotte, you have a strong body." And she said, "I believe
you have the possibilities of making a good Nun. A Cloistered
Nun. I believe you're the type that would be willing to give up
home, give up mother and daddy, give up everything you love out
in the world, and the world, so to speak, and hide yourself away
behind convent doors. Because I believe you're the kind that
would hide back there and be willing to sacrifice and live in crucial
poverty that you might pray for lost humanity." She said, "I
believe you're the kind that would be willing to suffer." Because
we're taught to believe, as Nuns, that as we suffer our loved ones,
and your loved ones that are already in a priest's purgatory will
be delivered from purgatory sooner because of our suffering.
She knew I was willing to suffer. I didn't murmur. I didn't
complain. She knew all of that. She's watching my life, and
that's the reason she began to tell me about the Black Veil.
And then, of course, you know, I didn't know too much about a
Cloistered Nun. I didn't know their lives. I didn't know how
they live. I didn't know what they've done, but, you know, this
woman proceeded to tell me.
Now we hear a lot of people try to tell me in the various
places that we travel and go - I've heard a lot of Roman
Catholics try to tell me, "I've been in so many Cloisters. I
know all about them." But you know a Roman Catholic can lie
to you. And they don't have to go to Confession and tell the
priest about the lie that they've told, because they're lying to
protect their faith. They can tell any lie they want to to protect
their faith and never go to the confessional box and tell the
priest about it.
They can do more than that. They can steal up to forty
dollars. And they don't have to tell the priest about it.
They don't have to say one word about it in the Confessional
box. They are taught that. Every Roman Catholic knows it. And
every Roman Catholic - you'd be horrified to know how many of them
steal up to that amount. And many of them lie. We've dealt with
them. I've dealt with hundreds and hundreds of them. I've
seen a good many of them fall in the altar and cry out to God to
save them. And you know before their saved, they look into my
face and hold my hand and lie to me. But after God gets a hold
of their heart, then they want to make right what they've told
me because they realize they've lied about it. But as long as
they're Roman Catholic, they're permitted to lie. And it's the
saddest thing. You can't expect them to know God, because God does
not condone sin.
I don't care who you are. I don't believe God condones sin.
And I don't believe He's going to condone it in the Roman
Catholic people, even though they're being misled and they're
being blinded and led into ways that are going to lead them
into a devil's hell.
I believe that with all of my heart, because I've lived in a
convent. I know something about how these people live and
what they do.
Now the day comes. She told me, "Charlotte, you have to be
willing to spill your blood. Jesus shed His upon Calvary."
She said, "You have to be willing to do penance. Heavy
penance," She said, "You have to be willing to live in
crucial poverty."
Now already I'm living in the pit of poverty, but I thought
that was going to make me holy, and draw me closer to God, and
would make me a better Nun. And so I'm willing to live in that
poverty.
LAYING IN A CASKET
And then on this particular morning, she told me what I would
be wearing. She said, "You'll spend nine hours in a casket."
And she explained a number of things to me. That is the most
I knew about it. And I didn't find that out until I had taken
my White Veil.
And so, on this particular morning, I'm twenty-one years of
age. But sixty days previous to my being twenty-one years of
age, I'm going to sign some papers that they place in front of
me. And those papers are this. I'm going to sign away every
bit of inheritance that I might have received from my family after
their death. Of course I signed that over to the Roman Catholic
Church. And oftentimes I say the Roman Catholic priests are
enticing girls - not only their background, not only their strong
bodies, their strong minds and strong wills - but he is enticing
girls where mothers and fathers have much property, and they are comfortably
fixed with the material things of this life. Why? Because when
that child enters the convent they're going to get a portion of
her money - of her father's money.
And I often say even salvation in the Roman Catholic Church is
going to cost you plenty of money. More than you know
anything about. And so they don't mind commercializing off of
that child and the inheritance that would have come to her.
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